


living arrangements, shovel talks

by tiredandjaded (CallingVersatile)



Series: make my heart your home [2]
Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Found Family, Gen, Guilt, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Just A Whole Lot Of Guilt, Lilith Clawthorne's No Good Very Bad Night, Luz Makes Lilith Cry: The Fanfic, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Post-Young Blood Old Souls, Protective Luz Too, Roommate Negotiations Of A Sort, Sister-Sister Relationship, protective eda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:13:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26638618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallingVersatile/pseuds/tiredandjaded
Summary: Eda, Luz and Lilith may have made it out of the Emperor's castle alive, but tensions are still high when they arrive at the Owl House. When Eda discovers the true cost Luz paid for their escape, will she be able to forgive Lilith?Or, redemption isn't just one grand act of sacrifice. It's the messy conversations that follow, hurt feelings, and maybe building something new.
Relationships: Eda Clawthorne & Lilith Clawthorne, Eda Clawthorne & Luz Noceda, Lilith Clawthorne & Luz Noceda
Series: make my heart your home [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1937986
Comments: 267
Kudos: 690





	1. Chapter 1

It wasn’t until she opened the door to a silent Hooty and a darkened living room that Eda truly realized how much had changed that night. Seeing the Owl House so quiet and dead was like a punch to the gut, but she had an exhausted apprentice and a now half-cursed sister to look after. Take care of them first, contemplate the loss of the one thing she’d been able to count on her entire life later. 

Or never. Never sounded good. 

“Right. No magic, no enchantment,” she remarked to the empty house. She could almost feel Lilith wince behind her. 

“Edalyn…” Lilith started, only for Eda to cut her off with a dismissive scoff. She strode into the darkened room, hopefully projecting a bit more confidence than she felt. Luz followed close behind her, while King scampered in and made a beeline for the couch. 

“Can it, Lily. We can have a pity party later, for now… well, are you coming in, or what?” 

Lilith still stood in the doorway, the light of the moon spilling over her shoulders, illuminating the edges of a hesitant, uncertain expression. Eda hadn’t seen her sister this openly _nervous_ since they were in Hexside together. 

“I wasn’t sure if I…” 

“I _guess_ you can stay, but the couch is mine,” King interjected loudly. Eda rolled her eyes, but Luz gave a little chuckle at his complete failure to read the room, so she figured she couldn’t hold it against him too much. With that declaration made, King promptly curled into a ball on the couch and fell asleep, seemingly within seconds. 

“You’re a fugitive from the emperor, genius,” Eda said flatly. So _now_ Lilith wanted to take the time to consider Eda’s feelings? Typical. She couldn’t have done that any time in the past… No. No, Eda had spent three decades fighting her sister. Maybe they could build something out of the wreckage of this night. In a gentler tone, she continued, “Where else are you gonna go? And besides… you did take half a curse for me.” Eda managed a smile at that, remembering how Lilith had helped restore her witch form. _Just like when we were kids…_ Lilith started to give a tentative smile back, until Luz spoke.

“A curse that _she_ put on you,” Luz muttered darkly. She was looking away from Lilith, but not enough that the witch couldn’t hear her words, and Eda was momentarily taken aback at the venom in her voice. She didn’t think she’d heard Luz that angry in… well, ever, really. It both warmed and broke her heart—she was touched that her apprentice cared so much about her, but hearing the normally-cheerful girl so upset sounded wrong.

“Right you are, kiddo! And I’ll be giving her shit over that ‘till the end of time, but right now? It’s dark in here. You think you got a couple light spells left in you?” Eda reckoned the adrenaline of their near escape was keeping Luz in good cheer—there was no way the kid wasn’t shaken up over the near-petrification. Eda would be there for Luz when she crashed, but right now, keeping her focused on a simple task would help, hopefully until after she had dealt with Lilith. 

_Being responsible is a nightmare._

Luz rummaged in her pockets for a few seconds, but turned up only a piece of chalk, which she held up apologetically.

“Is it okay if I draw on the floor? I think I used up all my notebook paper fighting Belos.” 

Alarm bells sounded in Eda’s head, and she heard Lilith make an undignified spluttering cough behind her. This night just couldn’t give her a break, because Eda could have sworn she just heard her apprentice say she _fought the Emperor of the Boiling Isles_.

“You _what?"_ Luz looked up from her half-drawn glyph on the floor with a grin, seemingly unaware of the sudden panic she’d sent Eda spiraling into. “Tell me you didn’t fight Belos, Luz,” Eda pleaded. 

“Wh—of course she didn’t,” Lilith cut in, sounding scandalized that Eda would even ask. “Emperor Belos captured me in an instant, there’s no way the human would have been able to-” 

Just as Eda was about to snarl and interrupt Lilith for daring to call Luz ‘the human,’ that ever-more-frequent burst of protectiveness heating her blood, she heard the slap of a palm making contact with the floor. The room burst into bright light, momentarily blinding Eda and cutting Lilith off mid-sentence. When the glare receded, Eda noticed two things. The first, a ball of light, larger than the usual ones summoned from sheets of paper, hanging in the air, bathing the living room in a gentle, orange glow. 

The second thing Eda noticed was Luz, no longer crouched on the ground but at Eda’s side, glaring defiantly at Lilith and holding a rectangular shard of porcelain—no, bone—up to her face. 

“This _human_ took a piece out of your stupid boss’s face, and I’d do it again to save Eda! So why don’t you just shut up!” It was only then that Eda truly realized what she was looking at. A piece of Belos’s mask. Lilith must have realized it, too; she looked even more shellshocked than Eda felt, which was impressive given the maelstrom of emotion Eda was currently experiencing. Horrified shock at the mere thought of Belos and Luz meeting face to face battled against a fierce, glowing pride at the knowledge that Luz had done the impossible, again, for her. The honey-sweet burst of love she felt hearing those words— _I’d do it again to save Eda_ —that quickly plummeted into terror as Eda realized that Emperor Belos now knew the name and face of her apprentice. 

Faced with this many conflicting impulses, Eda made the obvious choice and pulled Luz into a tight hug, who let out a surprised squeak before quickly bringing her arms up to meet snugly behind Eda’s back, pressing the side of her face against Eda’s chest in her signature full body hug. 

Feeling the pressure of Luz’s embrace, her strange, almost feverish human warmth, soothed Eda’s frayed nerves in a way nothing else could. It wasn’t until she had her—her apprentice? Her… daughter? It wasn’t until she had _Luz_ safe in her arms that Eda could truly begin to believe it was over. She considered herself a witch of few regrets, but as the cage trapping her cursed form had begun to ascend, the fact that Eda had only then found the courage to tell the kid she loved her was chief among them. Everything in her had ached to hold Luz one last time, a rend in her heart only now mended by the tangible, physical knowledge that right here, right now, _Luz was safe_. 

“Luz, sweetie,” Eda began, ignoring the poorly stifled cough of surprise from behind her. “Can you tell me exactly what happened?” 

“I would also like to know what occurred after my capture, and how you managed to free us,” Lilith said primly. 

“Sure thing, Eda!” Eda chuckled at the squished look on her sister’s face, like she’d sucked on a lemon, as she realized she had been ignored completely. 

With that, Luz animatedly launched into a tale that strung Eda along for pretty much the full spectrum of witch emotion. She glowed with pride as Luz described breaking into the castle a second time, taking out guards left and right. The thought of those stooges training their whole lives to become faceless pawns only to be blown away by _her apprentice,_ a human with two months of training and a lifetime sheer determination, brought a grin to Eda’s face, and she fervently wished she could have seen it. Her amusement melted away along with Luz’s enthusiasm as soon as her apprentice’s narration reached the point where she had met with a caged Eda. The memory of the cage, magical bars humming with threat, brought a faint echo of that _trapped-panicked-scared_ feeling, made all the more overwhelming at the time by the haze of anger cast over her by her cursed form, and Eda shivered. 

“No need to go over all that again,” Eda said, aiming for casual and falling miserably short—but Luz seemed to appreciate the excuse to skip past their tearful goodbye just as much as Eda did, and quickly moved on. 

“Okay… so, after the platform rose, I was…” Luz seemed to trip over her own words, sentence grinding to a mumbling halt. Eda (who at this point had relinquished Luz from her hug) put a hand on her shoulder and gave it a comforting squeeze. 

“You were?” 

Luz looked up at her, hesitation coloring her features. She stared searchingly into Eda’s eyes, before ducking her head down and staring at the floor. 

“I was going to leave, like you told me to.” There was none of the 'storyteller flair' (her words, not Eda’s) that Luz had been injecting into her tale up to this point. The words fell from her mouth limp and lifeless, and the only thing Eda heard in her voice was a low undercurrent of shame, the reason for which suddenly hit her. 

“Oh, Luz, honey…” murmured Eda, gentle as a summer breeze. Luz looked up at her, tears swimming in her eyes. “Please don’t feel bad. I wanted you to get out. I mean, obviously I’m glad you didn’t, but point is—you did nothing wrong.” 

Luz looked like she might argue, but apparently decided better of it. 

“Anyways,” Luz continued, “that’s when _she_ showed up.” 

Lilith (who Eda imagined was probably going insane from being excluded from a conversation for this long) cut in drily. 

“Yes, that’s when I showed up, and was immediately attacked by your apprentice. She had some… choice words regarding my actions.” 

Lilith at least had the decency to look ashamed, not quite meeting Eda’s eyes, but Eda had tuned out everything after “your apprentice.” She immediately turned to Luz and scooped her up in a hug, actually lifting the human off of her feet momentarily. 

“Lilith showed up and you _immediately attacked her?_ You really are my kid!” After one hug turned into several (though attempting to draw lines between said hugs felt rather pointless when Luz simply refused to let go) and Lilith’s grumbling complaints that Eda sounded way too happy about that were summarily ignored, Luz finally resumed her story. With King snoring on the couch, someone would have to fill him in tomorrow, but right now Eda needed to know how her apprentice, her amazing, clever, driven, but so very young apprentice, had managed to not only survive an encounter with the Emperor, but also free Eda from his clutches. 

“Right, so where were we…” Luz pondered, both feet now firmly on the ground. 

“Emperor Belos appearing from the shadows and whisking me away to join Edalyn in the petrification chamber, I imagine,” Lilith muttered.

“Yeah, so after Lilith and King got captured, Belos summoned these freaky flesh arms from the ground to grab my legs, and was all like, Let’s Talk, Human.” 

“Talk? What would the Emperor of the Boiling Isles want with-” 

“So obviously I used Owlbert to break out, and sent a wave of ice at him—which I had no idea I could do!” Luz raised her voice to speak over Lilith’s interruption. “Then things got kind of crazy. He did this weird thing where he, like, melted into the shadows? And then appeared behind me and uh. Threw me into a pillar.” 

“He _what?"_ Eda demanded, heart suddenly hammering in her chest. Luz raised her hands appeasingly at Eda. 

“It’s fine! I barely even felt it,” she insisted, which _did not make Eda feel any better_. The image of Luz hitting stone and sliding limply to the ground flashed in her mind’s eye, and she felt a spike of nausea in response. “Everything after that is kind of a blur. Lotta running, and flying, and throwing magic around without even having time to check what glyph it was… then he did his freaky voice-in-your-head trick, and I got distracted! He used his gross flesh hands to hold me down again… and that’s when I got him!”

“You… got him?” Lilith repeated, dumbfounded, and for once Eda found herself echoing the sentiment. Luz, apparently too invested in her story to remember her policy of pointedly ignoring the witch, nodded excitedly in response. 

“Yeah! The flesh arms pulled me down to my hands and knees, but I had managed to slip an ice glyph under one hand and keep my palm from touching it.” Eda’s heart was in her throat, blood still boiling at the thought of Luz knocked into a pillar. “I just needed him to get closer, and of course he couldn’t looming over me like some big creepy villain. He leaned in and was all like, had enough, human? And blam!” Luz mimicked slapping her hand down on a glyph. “Eda, it was _amazing_. I don’t know if it was having Owlbert with me, or what, but it was like the magic knew exactly what I needed it to be. It wasn’t a pillar, or a platform, it was a _spike_.” Luz tapped a spot just below her left eye. “It went straight for his face, put a big crack in his dumb looking mask, and left me with my nifty souvenir!” She beamed at Eda, then turned to stick her tongue out at Lilith. “How’s that for a human?” 

Lilith looked about as stunned as Eda felt. It was one thing—one terrifying, stressful, guilt-inducing thing—to hear your kid mention she tangled with Belos, another entirely to hear that she nearly put a magical spike of ice through his head. She wanted to—thank Luz, maybe? Apologize that she was put in that situation at all? Promise that nothing like that would ever happen to them again? 

Lilith recovered first, asking a question that hadn’t even begun to occur to Eda. 

“But… How did you get to us? Surely one attack wouldn’t incapacitate him.” 

Luz reacted instantly, slumping like a marionette with its strings cut. She fussed with the hem of her cloak, looking down and away from Eda. When she did meet her questioning gaze, the fire in her eyes from earlier is gone, replaced with a distant look that filled Eda with dread. 

“No… Belos was fine. I would have kept fighting, but then I heard… you, Eda.” For a second, Eda ridiculously assumed that Luz had heard her arguing with Lilith. The truth hit her a second later, eyes widening in a moment of dawning horror. 

“The petrification,” Eda croaked. Lilith looked sick, folding her hands in front of her in a way Eda recognized (still, after all these years) as an attempt to hide her discomfort behind a veil of propriety. 

Luz just nodded. 

“He told me…” She took a deep breath, and grabbed Eda’s hand for comfort. “He told me you were being turned to stone, but that there was still time for me to save you.” A yawning pit opened up in Eda’s stomach, pure dread consuming her because there’s no way he would just _let her go_. “All I had to do was… give him the portal to the human realm.” The pit became an open void, and Eda was in free fall. Her mouth moved without her permission, forming a desperate plea she already knew the answer to by the sinking feeling in her gut.

“Kid, please tell me you didn’t…” Luz’s grip on her hand tightened. Eda tried to meet her eye, but Luz stared resolutely at the floor, and Eda _knew_. The silence was choking as the seconds stretched on, filling Eda’s throat with dust. She wanted to apologize, to comfort her, to shake her and demand to know _why would you do that for_ me _?_

“You were _dying,_ Eda…” The anguish in Luz’s voice cut through Eda like razor sharp claws. She was dimly aware of Lilith’s full-body flinch in her peripheral vision, but at the moment Eda had eyes only for Luz, who looked up at her and fixed her with that look—fear wrapped in a resolute determination, the look of someone about to do the impossible for no reason other than it being _right_. “I couldn’t let him kill you.” 

Simple as that. The sky was orange, Palismans came from trees, and Luz wouldn’t let Belos kill Eda. No matter what it cost. 

“But I couldn’t let him have a way to Earth, either.” That quiet determination had gained an edge to it as Luz continued, her eyes hardening. “I gave him the door, he sent me up the elevator… and then I set off the fire glyphs I had stuck to the door.” 

The smile she gave Eda was a cracked, brittle thing, nothing like the bright grins Luz usually lit up a room with. Eda felt it slip between her ribs like the blade of a knife, piercing her heart in one smooth action. “No more portal! And I got to you in time, s-so everything turned out okay, right Eda?” The wallpaper of Luz’s forced cheer was ragged and peeling, yet Eda couldn’t bring herself to scrape it aside and reveal the ugly truth beneath: that the price of Eda’s freedom had been Luz’s entire world. 

_She gave up her mother to save you._

Numbly, Eda took Luz into her arms once more. The girl sagged against her, too spent from her confession to even return a hug. 

“You did amazing, kiddo,” Eda said roughly. She wasn’t sure if it was right to praise Luz for this, but the thought of breaking out her usual brand of brutal honesty right now made Eda feel sick. If Luz wasn’t ready to mourn right now, if what she needed was for someone to tell her that this wasn’t all for nothing, then Eda could do that. And when she did break down, Eda would be there for her, in any way she needed. 

_You made a child give up her entire world to save your life._ Eda flinched as if the thought had scalded her. As a wild witch, on the run from the law, Eda was no stranger to setbacks or losses. She had always considered it a cost of doing business, an acceptable risk for her free-spirited life. If she couldn’t foist the problem onto some other hapless sucker, she would take her lumps and move on. 

No one had ever willingly thrown themselves into the fire for Eda’s sake before. The flicker of warmth she felt each and every time Luz proved (as she so often did) how much she cared was doused under a deluge of shame as she realized that a child—and wasn’t that underselling it; Luz wasn’t just a child, she was her apprentice, her _kid_ —had paid the price for Eda’s mistakes. 

Except. 

That wasn’t quite true, was it? 

The thought itched in the back of her mind as Eda rather suddenly remembered there was a third person in the room. 

Lilith, who had appeared uncomfortable before, now looked downright shaken. She was standing just a few feet from Eda and Luz, and as Eda’s eyes locked on her, the nagging itch in the back of her mind became a dull roar. 

Because while Luz might have been there to save Eda’s life, the reason Eda’s life had been in danger at all was standing right in front of her. 

It was Lilith who had put the curse on her all those years ago. Lilith who decided the best solution to that was to hunt Eda down and have her arrested. 

It was Lilith who kidnapped Luz to use as bait for Eda. Who had nearly _killed her_ trying to exhaust Eda’s magic, because she was so certain her precious Emperor would cure Eda, just like that! 

Luz hadn’t been forced to give up her only way home to make up for Eda’s mistake. She had paid the ultimate price—her home, her family, her world—for _Lilith’s pride._

Eda stroked Luz’s hair gently, making a formidable effort to keep in check the thrum of anger setting her nerves alight. She had been planning on having a talk with Lilith the following morning, get the awkward apologies out of the way after a good night’s sleep, then set up a few ground rules. 

As it stood, Eda didn’t think she’d be getting much sleep anytime soon. A vicious tension had coiled its way around her spine, demanding action. She wanted to pace, to shout, to take a swing at Lilith, who continued to just _stand there._

That was what the Eda of three months ago would have done. It was what the Eda of right here, right now desperately wanted to do… but it wasn’t what Luz needed. She took a moment to simply observe the human, still leaning into her side as Eda continued to card her fingers through Luz’s hair, and allowed the blooming warmth that filled her chest to cut through some of her hurt and frustration. 

“Luz, honey,” Eda murmured, tenderness she’d kept hidden from the world for so long creeping into her voice. It was a vulnerability she had come to associate with Luz and Luz alone, a side of Eda that no one else had the privilege of seeing. She stroked a thumb against Luz’s cheek, feather-light, and Luz looked up at her, brown eyes glittering in the illumination of her own spell. “It’s getting pretty darn late. Why don’t you head on up to bed while I have a little chat with Lilith?” Luz nodded, stepped away from Eda… then turned back, an almost shy look of uncertainty on her face. 

“Can I… can I bring my sleeping bag to your room tonight?” Eda was certain she just felt another little piece of her heart crack and splinter in her chest. _Does she not feel safe in her own room?_ She brushed the thought aside and offered Luz a gentle smile.

“Of course, kiddo,” Eda replied, lighter than she felt. “You go get your stuff, I’ll be right up.” Luz gave another subdued nod, but instead of turning around and heading for the stairs, she took a step towards Eda and wrapped her arms around her, far gentler than her usual rib-creaking hugs. 

“I love you, Eda,” Luz whispered, and in spite of all her guilt and frustration, Eda was fervently thankful that she had been given another chance, in less dire circumstances, to return the words. 

“I love you too, Luz.” 

After one final squeeze for Eda and a distrustful look aimed in Lilith’s direction, Luz slowly began to trudge up the stairs leading to Eda’s bedroom. The air in the room seemed to thicken with tension as her footsteps grew fainter and fainter, before the quiet click of a door could be heard echoing down the stairwell. 

And then, finally, Eda was alone with her sister. The anger she had been holding back rushed through her like a river flooding its banks, her face twisting into a sharp scowl as she turned to face Lilith. The slight bob Lilith’s throat as she swallowed nervously in response added a note of grim satisfaction to the storm of rage brewing inside Eda’s chest. 

“Alright, Lilith,” Eda growled. “ _Let’s talk_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this idea has been living rent free in my head since the day young blood, old souls aired, so i'm very excited to start getting it out there. is it apparent yet that i really like writing messy family relationships? to anyone who asked me to continue make my heart your home, well, this is that. young blood old souls aftermath, but with the added flavor of Luz and Eda's more solidified familial bond was too tasty of an idea for me to pass up.
> 
> if you enjoyed this fic, or if i made you very sad (or even better, both) i'd greatly appreciate a comment! they really make my day. thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eda and Lilith have a much-needed chat. Apologies are attempted.

The crisp night air was bracing as Eda stepped out the front door of the Owl House, but did nothing to quell the smoldering frustration melting a hole in her chest. Lilith followed behind her, closing the door gently with a click that seemed far too loud in the tense silence between the two. No sounds of wildlife filtered in from the forest, no insects singing their nightly songs. The Owl House stood silent, the eye of what was shaping up to be a very ugly storm. 

After Luz had disappeared upstairs, everything in Eda had ached to tear into Lilith right there and then. Recalling the forced cheer Luz had plastered on as she described throwing away her one chance at returning home had Eda’s heart feeling like one jagged, bleeding edge, and all she wanted to do was to sink it into the person responsible for putting her kid in this situation. 

She hadn’t wanted to disturb Luz with what would inevitably become a shouting match, though, so Eda had ‘suggested’ they take this chat outdoors. And now that Lilith was here, standing beside her in the waxy glow of a crescent moon… she had no idea how to start. 

Oh, the anger was certainly still there, buzzing through her veins like a thrum of electricity. The shame, too—the thought that Luz gave up her whole world for Eda wouldn’t leave her alone, which was _stupid_ because the person actually responsible was standing a foot away from her and Eda _still couldn’t think of what to say._

They were still just awkwardly standing there, too. _That at least,_ Eda thought, _I can fix._

Except the spell circle she spun to pull her rickety lawn chairs from whatever corner of the house they’d been left in sputtered and failed, because Eda didn’t have magic anymore. She let out a wordless growl of frustration and sat down on the chill ground in an undignified heap, ignoring both the pebbles digging into her calves and the protesting ache of her joints. Looks like half a curse was still enough to make her body feel like it was falling apart. Just her luck. 

When she glanced up at a still-standing Lilith, looking as nervous as the day they’d tried out for the Grudgby team together, that sour feeling doubled. 

“It’s just dirt, Lilith. It won’t kill you,” Eda said disdainfully. Lilith flinched. 

“That’s not-" She cut herself off, then sighed. Lilith smoothed the skirt of her dress out under her and sat down next to Eda, folding her legs elegantly beneath her in a prim posture completely at odds with the dirt and uneven tufts of grass that made up Eda’s front lawn. 

And Eda… still didn’t know what to say. Or maybe she had the opposite problem—there was simply so much inside her aching to be let out, she didn’t even know where to start. She wanted to scream at Lilith, wanted Lilith to plead for her forgiveness so Eda could throw it back in her face. To wield those thirty years of bad blood like a dagger and plunge it right into the softest part she could find. She wanted Lilith to know, to not just be told but _understand_ what she had put Luz through, an understanding that would fill her lungs with tar and- 

A painfully awkward clear of the throat pulled Eda from her spiraling thoughts, snapping her attention to Lilith, who startled a bit at the sudden scrutiny. Her sister’s obvious nerves might have been nostalgic (or at the very least, amusing) in any other situation, but as it was, it only served to annoy Eda further. What right did Lilith have to tiptoe around the issue after what she did?

“Well?” Eda snapped. “Are you gonna say something, or what?” 

“Edalyn, I… I’m so sorry for cursing you!” Lilith gave apologies much like one released a dangerous beast from captivity. It seemed to burst forth, scaring her with its intensity, too loud and too earnest in the oppressive silence of the night air. Eda almost expected her to take it back, but after taking a breath to steel herself, Lilith continued. 

“It was the most awful mistake of my life,” she said bitterly. “I was a scared, jealous fool, I thought it would just be for one night, but I… I never should have…” These were words Eda had spent decades hoping to hear, and for a moment, all she wanted to do was to reach out and comfort her sister, to draw her into a hug, to tell her everything was okay now. 

And then Lilith just had to keep talking.

“Everything I did after that was to try and fix it, I swear. I couldn’t tell anyone, I—I needed my position in the Emperor’s Coven to have any hope of curing you.” Her voice had taken on a desperate, pleading tone, but the words were poison to Eda’s ears. She felt a bitter laugh threaten to well up inside her and forced it down, because really, what had she expected? “He told me he had the power to cure you, all I ever wanted was to help, but I just couldn’t beat you, and he told me—” Lilith swallowed, too consumed in her own shame to even look at Eda, and isn’t that just _so_ fitting. “He told me if I didn’t capture you today, he would…” 

That final puzzle piece slotting into place took Eda from bitter reverie to incandescent rage so fast her head spun. With horrible clarity, she recalled the desperation Lilith had come at her with. Luz, trapped, the bridge, the _spikes,_ the portal—All of it, because her sister didn’t want to lose her job.

 _She hasn’t even mentioned Luz yet,_ Eda realized, and suddenly the thought of hearing one more word of this pathetic attempt at an apology was unbearable to her. 

Letting out a bestial snarl was maybe not the most tactful way to interrupt, but Eda was not in a tactful mood. The wrath of the Owl Beast had nothing on what Eda was going to do to her sister if she didn’t shut up _right now._

“Edalyn?” Lilith said, eyes wide with obvious shock and more than a touch of fear. “Are you—is the curse-” 

“Do you know how old Luz is?” 

The question was clearly not one she was expecting. Lilith blinked a few times in confusion before letting out a huff of annoyance. 

“Edalyn, I’m trying to—Why in the Titan’s name would I know how old the human is?” The genuine bafflement in Lilith's voice at the thought that she should know, combined with that phrase, _the human,_ severed the final, fraying strands of Eda’s control with a satisfying snap. 

“You do _not_ get to call her that,” Eda snarled, golden fang glinting in the moonlight as she leaned into Lilith’s space, pressing a finger into her chest so far she’s forced to lean back. Lilith stammered, her eyes wide, but Eda wasn’t done. “Her name is _Luz._ She’s not some animal or exhibit, she’s my kid, and if I ever hear you calling her that again, I’ll-” 

“Okay, okay!” Lilith scooted back to escape her sister’s wrath, which Eda allowed only because she was pretty sure her threat had been seconds from devolving into frustrated growling. “I’m sorry! I really am, but—I don’t see what Luz’s age has to do with me apologizing.” 

Eda stared at her evenly. The nimbus of rage she had been suspended in was coalescing into something sharper and more dangerous. Something she could use. 

“A lot. She’s fourteen, by the way,” Eda supplied, forcing some facsimile of calm. The sudden absence of her fury seemed to unsettle Lilith more than her snarling had; it took her a few seconds to muster up the courage to respond.

“Okay?” 

“I just want you to answer one thing for me, then you can continue your whole grand apology.” Lilith sighed in relief, posture relaxing as she leaned back towards Eda, utterly unaware of the hammer about to drop. 

“Of course, Edalyn. Anything.” 

Eda’s anger had always burned bright. It demanded an exit, needing not just to be felt, but to affect the world around her. When she and Lilith had been kids, Eda was always the one to lash out and make her displeasure known over any slight, perceived or real. Titan only knows how many ‘priceless family heirlooms’ (read: fancy plates that never left the wall they were mounted on) Eda had destroyed in her youth. The point was, she had never been one for cold rage. 

Tonight was a night of firsts, it seemed. 

“I was just wondering,” Eda began calmly, turning the words over one last time in her mind, honing them to a lethal spike before her voice turned frigid. “When my sister became the kind of person who would kill a child to save her own skin.” 

What should have been a nice, satisfying stunned silence was broken by Lilith’s choked gasp. She flinched bodily, as if Eda had followed through on her original plan to just punch her in the gut and be done with it. She stared up at Eda with a mounting horror in her eyes that only served to stoke the flames of Eda’s fury. What right did _she_ have to react that way? 

“K-kill a—Edalyn, no, I would never have-” Lilith scrambled back as if to put some distance between herself and the accusation, eyes wide with shock. “I wasn’t going to _kill_ her, I-” 

“Oh, you would never have killed her, just used her as a shield for magical blasts strong enough to vaporize her, right?” Eda snarled. Her icy composure was gone in an instant, and she was all fury and flame, heart pounding so loud she could hear it in her ears. 

“I-I knew you wouldn’t hurt her!” Lilith blurted out desperately. “It was just-”

“You _knew I wouldn’t hurt her?_ Is that really what you told yourself?” Eda laughed, a bitter, sarcastic thing that sounded like breaking glass. “‘Eda is the one throwing the spells, if Luz dies it’s not _my_ fault.’ Was that it?” 

“I wouldn’t have let her die…” The protest was weak, almost instinctual. Lilith was barely even looking at Eda, trembling faintly as she gripped her knees with white-knuckled hands, but it slipped out anyway. 

Eda kind of wanted to scream. Or throw up. Or find out how much damage a non-magical staff could do to a witch’s face. But she had an apprentice inside who she really didn’t need to re-traumatize, so by some miracle of self-restraint, Eda managed to do none of those things. 

“Titan, how are you not sick of lying to yourself at this point?” She shot a hateful look at her sister. “Okay, _Lily,_ ” Eda said, putting every last drop of disdain she could muster into the nickname. “Let’s play this game. What was the plan if I hadn’t been able to divert one of those attacks? What if I had lost consciousness before my magic ran out when you were forcing her towards certain death? You never would have killed her, so there had to have been a plan, right? _Right?"_

The stunned, horrified silence that followed shouldn’t have been a surprise to Eda. But it still hurt. A vision of Luz, bloodied and broken, body pierced by uncaring stone, flashed into Eda’s mind and she flinched, throat closing up with grief. 

Lilith said nothing. 

“That’s what I thought,” Eda said hollowly. “She was an acceptable loss. Just like me.” That of all things had Lilith scrambling to her knees, heedless of the dirt and grass staining her once pristine robe. 

“Edalyn, you were never an acceptable loss-” 

_“This isn’t about me, you idiot!”_ Eda was on her feet too now, heart thumping wildly in her chest. She knew she had just been way too loud, and a detached, far more responsible part of her hoped Luz hadn’t been listening at a window, but the dam had burst and there was nowhere for her frustration to go but out. “This is about you, and what you did to Luz! You treated her like an object, like something for you to use. She could have died a dozen times, and you _still_ don’t even care! You just sit here and tell me you were trying to _help me_ by almost killing my… my…” 

Eda couldn't finish. This was too much. The whirlwind of fury that had kept her afloat was crumbling, leaving behind a numb grief as Eda considered for what felt like the hundredth time that night just how close she had been to losing Luz forever. She hardly even noticed when she fell to her knees, fists clenched so tight her claws dug painfully into the meat of her palms. 

After what felt like an eternity, but could have been less than a minute, she heard Lilith sit down beside her. Eda wanted to snap at her, to force her away, but merely summoning the effort to look at her sister felt like it took everything she had in her at the moment. Lilith was staring at her with an unreadable expression on her face.

“I love her,” Eda said thickly, forcing the words through the lump in her throat and willing herself not to cry. “I would’ve turned that castle and everyone in it to _dust_ to keep her safe. And you almost…” She couldn’t bring herself to say it again. 

Eda was pulled forcibly from her despair by two words, words she never thought she would hear from her sister, and for a moment all she could do was stare in disbelief. 

“You’re right.” Lilith’s voice, when she spoke, held none of the panicked denial of just a minute ago, though it was low with shame. “I wasn’t thinking about th—About Luz’s safety. I just wanted an edge over you. I told myself it was _justified,_ that it would be _worth it."_ She spat the words like they were poison. “I knew she was staying at the Owl House, but I didn’t realize I was kidnapping your _daughter."_

Lilith sounded so miserable that Eda’s first thought was to reach out and comfort her. A split second later, she actually registered her sister’s words. 

_My daughter?_

Lilith seemed to take her stunned silence as recrimination, and hurried to correct herself. 

“I mean, not that it would have been okay if she wasn’t your daughter, of course, but-“ 

That was about the point where Eda’s brain finally rebooted. 

“She’s not.” 

“Huh?” Eda wasn’t sure she had ever heard her sister caught so genuinely off guard. In their adult years, at least. 

“She’s, uh, not my daughter. Technically.” 

_Technically._ Eda fervently prayed for a pit to open up beneath her feet and swallow her, to no avail. Why had she said that? It just—slipped out. _Technically._ Titan, she was a mess. 

“But you… she… no, hold on. What?” Lilith’s genuine bafflement only added to Eda’s shame. 

“It’s complicated, okay!” Eda snapped, looking pointedly away from Lilith. Unfortunately, this did not prevent Lilith from catching a glimpse of her face. 

“Edalyn, are you—are you blushing?” 

Yep. She absolutely was. Was petrification still an option? It had to be better than this.

“No! Shut up!” Eda protested. Lilith actually _giggled,_ and for a second Eda was back at Hexside with her big sister, walking home from school and teasing one another over anything they could think of, and she couldn’t help the wry grin that spread across her face. 

“You totally are!” Lilith insisted gleefully. Eda sat back down next to her and punched her in the shoulder lightly, rolling her eyes. “No, no, it makes sense,” Lilith continued. “I mean, I never would have taken you for the motherly type, but…” She smiled at Eda, a soft, genuine smile she hadn’t seen in so many years. “You were really sweet in there. It was nice.” 

“Yeah, well, I didn’t exactly expect it either. Luz has a way of bringing out the best in people. Doesn’t even know she’s doing it, either.” Eda said fondly. “She’s a brilliant witch, too. Figured out those glyphs all by herself.” 

“Are you _sure_ you’re not her mother?” Lilith teased. Eda rolled her eyes and ignored the ridiculous fluttery feeling in her chest. 

“Yes, I’m sure,” she responded, faking annoyance. “She has an actual mom, back in the… human realm…” her mind caught up with what she was saying, and Eda felt her blood turn to ice. The bubble of hope that had been building as she laughed alongside her sister was crushed under an ocean of self loathing. Had she just _forgotten_ the destruction of the portal? That Luz might never be able to see her mother again? That the person responsible for it was sitting right beside her? 

_She gave up her mother for you. Her world for your life._

“You know. The home she might never be able to go back to. Because of your brilliant plan.” Eda tried to grab the reins of her anger, but it just came out flat. Despairing. Lilith flinched, but it brought Eda no satisfaction. “It’s not just that you put her in danger when you kidnapped her—you couldn’t even fix your mistakes on your own. You had to bring her back into the castle, face to face with Belos-” 

“I know! I know it was wrong, but Edalyn, I—I didn’t see any other way, I couldn’t let him kill you-” 

“Well maybe you should have!” The words exploded out of her, sharp and jagged and far too honest. Eda wanted to take them back but her chest felt like an open wound. Something inside her had shattered and the grief was pouring out, whether she liked it or not. Lilith looked stricken, staring at her with horror dancing in her eyes, but Eda didn’t, couldn’t care. “Maybe then Luz wouldn’t be trapped here! She wouldn’t have had to choose between her whole world and… and _me_.” Her vision began to blur, but before she even had the chance to turn away in shame, Eda found herself pulled with surprising force against her sister and wrapped in a tight hug. Slender arms encircled her shoulders, the faint scent of lavender that Lilith still favored after all these years emanating from the fabric of her robes. Some long forgotten part of Eda, buried and vestigial, whispered _you’re safe now, it’s okay,_ and finally, she crumbled. Tears rolled down her cheeks, hot and bitter, and she curled further into her sister’s cloak. There, buried in the fabric of Lilith’s robe, half-hoping she wouldn’t hear it, Eda finally gave voice to the question that had been gnawing at her this whole time. Her voice was thick and raspy, but the burning weight of guilt in her chest forced it out. 

“Why would she choose me?” 

Eda both heard and felt Lilith’s sharp intake of breath at the question, close as she was. 

“Well,” Lilith began carefully, “I imagine it would have something to do with the fact that she clearly adores you.” 

“And look where that got her,” Eda muttered bitterly. Lilith tightened her arms around her in response, and Eda’s pride battled with the fact that she hadn’t gotten a hug from her sister in decades and could really use one right now.

“Edalyn, no. You are not allowed to beat yourself up over this.” That authoritative tone Lilith always took, the one that normally made Eda want to break something, instead sounded… caring. “I’ve been running from the consequences of my actions for too long. You wanted me to stop making excuses? Then let me take responsibility for this.” Lilith took a deep breath, letting it out in a shuddering sigh. Eda reluctantly extracted herself from her arms, getting the feeling her sister had something she needed to say, though she still leaned against Lilith for support. 

“The portal was destroyed because of my actions, and mine alone, so don’t you dare blame yourself for that. You did everything you could to save Luz, even throwing your life away, and I… I took advantage of that.” Lilith sounded close to tears, and that, more than anything, out Eda off balance. She had never known Lilith to cry. Even when the two were teenagers, her sister would hide her grief from the world, Eda included. “I was scared, and desperate, but more than that, I told myself it would all be _worth it."_ Lilith let out a bitter laugh. “What kind of person does that? So no, I won’t let you blame yourself for what happened. If you need to hate someone for it…” Another breath, a quiet exhale. Lilith closed her eyes. “Then you can hate me.” 

For a moment, Eda’s whole world shrank down to just her and Lilith. The part of Eda that had been burned time and time again, that had fought her sister for longer than they’d gotten along, urged her to take the out she had been given and run. Whispered that Lilith could never be trusted, that she would only hurt Eda again. 

Then, Eda thought of Luz, of barriers broken down and walls disassembled. Of just how much brighter her life had become with the terrifying act of letting another person in. 

Eda reached out and wrapped an arm around Lilith’s shoulder. Her sister looked bewildered. 

“I’m tired of trying to hate you,” Eda rasped, voice still scratchy and gross from crying, though the actual tears had stopped. “Can we just be sisters again?” Lilith leaned her head against Eda’s shoulder, finally relaxing against her. 

“I would like that very much,” Lilith said quietly.

Eda couldn’t say how long they sat out there, watching the stars. No further words were exchanged—Eda suspected they were both extremely drained in that regard, Clawthornes and emotional honesty were like oil and water. 

Eda knew this wasn’t the resolution of all her issues with Lilith. They hadn’t even really broached the topic of the curse, or the years of attempted capture. But Eda had gotten a real, genuine apology from her sister, no excuses or justifications. Lilith admitting she had been flat-out _wrong_ was something Eda could hardly even have imagined. Now they were sitting together, not fighting or arguing, just watching the stars, and it was like a part of her that had been missing so long she’d forgotten it ever existed had been slotted back into place. 

Eventually, the companionable silence was split by a yawn from Lilith, which reminded Eda that she hadn’t exactly worked out sleeping arrangements. She nudged Lilith with her arm. 

“You sound tired. ‘Fraid it’s gonna be the couch for you tonight, though. Just move King to one of the chairs, he sleeps like a rock. Tomorrow we can get you sorted with an actual room, see what we’re gonna do about clothes and all that junk.” Titan, being responsible was exhausting.

“I may have been perilously close to falling asleep just now,” Lilith admitted. “The couch sounds lovely, even if my back will hate me for it in the morning.” With that she got to her feet, dusting off the grass and pebbles sticking to her robes with a frown. 

“Oh, and Lilith—about Luz-” 

“I know, don’t call her ‘the human’ or you’ll take my head off. I remember,” Lilith interrupted. 

“No, that’s—well, yes, that definitely still applies. But what I was _going to say,”_ Eda said pointedly, and was slightly surprised by the abashed look Lilith gives her in response, “Was that Luz might need a little space. From you specifically. She’s a tough kid, but she’s still a kid, and, well, you nearly killed her. Once the adrenaline wears off, I’m not exactly sure how she’ll react to being around you. So just… be good, okay?” 

“I won’t bother her, I promise,” Lilith said seriously. 

“Look at this— _me_ asking _you_ to be on good behavior. What’s the world come to?” Eda quipped. The amused snort she got in response stirred a light, airy feeling in Eda’s chest. It really was good to have her sister back. 

“You coming in?” Lilith asked, leaning down and offering a hand to Eda, but Eda shook her head. 

“Think I’m gonna stay out here for a bit, clear my head a little,” she replied. If she were honest, it was mostly that she didn’t want Luz to see her so obviously upset. She could wait until her eyes were a bit less red to go in. It was a perfectly nice night, though… and she did have a lot to think about. Lilith nodded and straightened to her full height, but made no move to turn back to the house. Just as Eda was beginning to wonder what the deal was, she spoke. 

“I still owe you a proper apology. For the curse, and for… everything else.” 

“Yeah, you do,” Eda said bluntly, though not unkindly. “But not tonight. We’re both dead on our feet. We can sort out our issues in the morning, okay? We’ve got time.” And wasn’t that just the wildest thing? They had time. Eda would wake up tomorrow to a house full of her family. 

“I suppose we do,” Lilith said with a trace of wonder. “Goodnight, Edalyn.” 

“‘Night, Lily,” Eda said, but some sentimental instinct (no doubt instilled by Luz) told her it was wrong to leave it at that. “It’s, uh, good to have you back.” 

“You too, Edalyn. I… this might be horrible to say, but I’m glad she chose you.” 

Eda didn’t know what to say to that. Perhaps Lilith wasn’t expecting a response; after a moment she turned and began to make her way back to the Owl House. When she heard the faint click of the front door shutting, Eda let out a sigh, shoulders falling as she released their long-held tension. Tomorrow would be its own ordeal, of that she was certain. Thinking of Lilith still brought a complicated knot of conflicting feelings to her chest, and one apology, even a good one, wasn’t going to be enough to fix that. It was likely their relationship would never be the same… but they had one beyond simple antagonism, and that was something Eda had never thought she’d be able to say again. 

_What a night._ Eda slowly got to her feet, dusting off a few lingering pebbles that clung to her dress. She rolled her shoulders to work out a bit of the stiffness and was rewarded with a satisfying pop, then started to make her way back towards the Owl House. _At least it’s over now._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that went well, right? i think it went well. lilith didn't even get punched! 
> 
> here's to another chapter that ended up being super personal totally by accident! hopefully that translated to it being Real™ or at least resonant with some of you. if not, sorry I tricked you into reading 5000 words of dialogue, but it's all part of my master plan. 
> 
> if you liked it, or if it caused you great pain but in an emotionally cathartic way you can't help but seek out, i'd love to hear about it! writing this fic can be very emotional work, so I really enjoy when people let me know what they were feeling when reading along. your kudos and comments are fantastic motivation to write more! 
> 
> thanks for reading!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Luz notices Lilith coming back in to the Owl House alone, she assumes the worst and confronts the witch about Eda's safety.

Luz Noceda was worried. 

If one had asked her just a few days ago, she would have said that she was a pretty carefree person most of the time. While she obviously wasn’t above nerves, worrying about things beyond her control never seemed to help! She preferred to either find a solution, or focus on something enjoyable to cheer herself up rather than work herself into knots over an issue. 

The past thirty hours or so (had it really only been that long?) however, had seen her and worry become very well acquainted, and now, worry sidled up to her like an old friend, slung an arm around her shoulders, and whispered _why isn’t Eda in yet?_

It had now been about ten, maybe fifteen minutes since Luz had left Eda and Lilith to talk to themselves. She had planned on grabbing her sleeping bag and taking it to Eda’s room, then brushing her teeth and getting her pajamas on, but as she opened the door to her room, something in her hesitated. She closed the door and crept back to the top of the stairwell, not eavesdropping of course, just… 

Okay, yeah, it was eavesdropping. But she didn’t manage to overhear anything, so did it really count? She barely caught the tail end of a terse “Let’s take this outside” before the front door had clicked shut. 

So Eda and Lilith were talking outside. Away from her. That was fine. Maybe Eda was going to swear at Lilith and didn’t want her to hear. There was absolutely no reason for the trickle of anxiety that’d started the second the front door had closed. Eda could take care of herself! Besides, Lilith had turned her back on Emperor Belos in the end and helped them escape. 

_Eda doesn’t have her magic anymore, though._

Luz shook her head as if to clear the traitorous thought. Eda wouldn’t want her worrying about her like that. She should just go brush her teeth, grab her sleeping bag, and wait for Eda to come back in. And that’s exactly what she would do! 

_I’m just making sure she’s out there,_ Luz told herself as she padded down the dark hallway to a front-facing window. She peered out one of the non-stained glass windows. Her first scan revealed nothing, turning that trickle of anxiety into a steady pulse, but a closer look revealed two figures sitting next to one another, illuminated by the moonlight but just out of the way enough to escape her notice at first. Luz let out a little sigh of relief, shoulders dropping. When had she gotten so tensed up? 

_See,_ she thought to herself. _They’re just talking. Lilith isn’t going to try anything. Probably._

At this rate, Eda would come back in before Luz even got around to brushing her teeth. After one final glance at the two witches conversing outside, Luz decided her first order of business would be to move her stuff to Eda’s room. 

Walking around the Owl House at night was something that had terrified Luz at first, honestly. The otherworldly decor that had seemed so charming when she first arrived took on an eerie quality in the dark, making strange twisted shadows that seemed to dance around the room. Her first night in the Boiling Isles had been spent huddled fearfully in her sleeping bag, hoping Eda had been joking about the ‘night critters.’ 

Now? Luz could barely remember what she had been so scared of. The darkened hallways held no hidden terrors, just dust and a few closets Eda hadn’t cleaned in years. The creaking and groaning of the timbers she had found so unsettling was a comfortable ambience. Even the smell of the house, a mix of musty antique shop smell and alchemical reagents utterly foreign to her human nose, was familiar to her now. After a day like today, it was good to be home. 

When she reached the door to her bedroom, Luz couldn’t help but trace the burnt edges of the words adorning her door. LUZ NOCEDA, WITCH APPRENTICE, it declared in blocky, inelegant text, seared right into the wood. Luz had only asked for her name on the door, so she could stop accidentally walking into yet another different broom closet. The burst of gratitude Luz had felt when Eda had magicked the latter part into the wood was so strong she almost started crying while thanking Eda, who in turn assumed she had done something wrong and started to panic. 

It had been a bit of a mess, but the memory never failed to make her smile, and now was no exception. 

Then Luz opened the door, and her smile vanished like mist in the morning sun. The room was in a state of total disarray after her preparations to rescue Eda. All of her stuff had been unceremoniously shoved to one side of the room. Crumpled sheets of paper lay scattered around the room bearing unusable glyphs (she’d been trembling ever since that desperate flight home), hurled in frustration. Luz winced at the chair leg she was almost certain hadn’t been broken the other day. She… didn’t remember breaking it, but to be honest, she didn’t remember much between Eda’s transformation on the bridge and her break-in at the Conformatorium. It was all one big blur of adrenaline and fear and _save Eda._ The words had become something between a prayer and a mantra for Luz in those few desperate hours of preparation, a phrase she could repeat to herself over and over and maybe if she did it enough she wouldn’t have to think about the fact that Eda could already be-

Luz shuddered. Setting foot in this room felt… odd, like she was trying to walk in her own footprints. Even if the specifics were hazy, she vividly remembered the weight of dread in her gut as she hunched over papers and scribbled glyphs, trying to fight the ever-growing certainty that she was too late and this was all her fault. Just being in the room again brought some phantom of anxiety with it, making her skin crawl. _It’s okay now, Eda’s safe,_ she reminded herself. _She’s right outside with Lilith._

For some reason, the thought did nothing to calm her racing heartbeat. Luz took a deep, controlled breath, held it for seven seconds, then exhaled for four. She did not need to start hyperventilating right now, thank you very much! Luz could just grab her stuff real quick and be out of the room she had spent the most panicked hours of her life in. 

Sleeping bag and pillow, check. A brief moment of scrounging revealed her extra notepad and pen, as well as her phone, which she hadn’t taken on her rescue mission for fear of it being further damaged. Luz was just about to leave when she saw it, laid face up on the floor next to her paper explosion. 

The picture of her and her mom. Smiling, happy, together. Back on Earth. 

Luz felt her breath hitch in her throat as she took it in. Guilt and shame swirled in her gut as she remembered the flames ripping through the frame of the portal, her one way back to her mom. 

She still didn’t regret it. Luz wasn’t sure what that said about her. 

_I’m sorry, mama. I couldn’t let her die._

Luz checked her phone. No signal, as expected. She wouldn’t be getting any messages to her mom anytime soon. Still, there was something she could do… even if it was only to make herself feel better. 

After recording her video message to her mom, Luz changed into her pajamas and slipped back out of her room into the hallway, pillow-stuffed sleeping bag in her arms, spirits somewhat lifted. She _would_ find another way home, one way or another. She still had a month and a half before she was supposed to be back from camp, that had to be enough. 

At some point while recording, Luz had thought she’d heard raised voices outside, but when she passed the window she had spied from earlier, Eda and Lilith seemed to be just… sitting together. 

It should have been an encouraging sight. Them getting along was the best outcome, right? Yet something in Luz flared up in protest, that same trickle of discomfort mixed with another feeling she couldn’t put a name to. It wasn’t just worry, it was like… 

Well, whatever. Hopefully Eda would be in soon; Lilith could stay out there all night as far as Luz was concerned. Sleeping bag in tow, Luz made her way down the hall to Eda’s room. She pushed open the door, winced at the long, drawn out creak it had begun producing a few weeks after her arrival, and was faced with a decision. 

Where should she sleep? 

The obvious answer was ‘on the floor, dummy.’ It wasn’t exactly the most comfortable, but she’d been doing it for over a month now and was more than used to it. There was just one thing. One extremely silly, dumb thing that, honestly, wasn’t even worth thinking about! 

...She was 14 for god’s sake! She wasn’t a kid anymore, it would be utterly embarrassing to ask to sleep in the nest. Eda would probably think it was weird and say no, anyways. Fourteen was way too old for a kid to sleep in the same bed as as their m— 

That train of thought was derailed by the clunk of the front door closing. Luz threw her stuff into the nest in a panic, before immediately deciding it was too embarrassing and scrambling to remove it. Then she stopped to listen for a second. Light footfalls, evenly timed, making their way up the stairs.

There was only one set of footsteps. 

There was only one set of footsteps, _and it wasn’t Eda._ Dread gripped Luz’s heart with fingers of steel, her breath coming harsh and fast. Why wasn’t Eda back? Was she hurt? Had Lilith done something? Oh god, what if Lilith had decided she didn’t want to share the curse after all? Could she do that? 

The sound of footsteps grew louder, the click of flats on wooden floorboards confirming Luz’s suspicion that this was not Eda. When they stopped outside her door, Luz felt her blood turn to ice. She didn’t move, didn’t even dare to breathe despite the hammering of her heartbeat. After a few seconds that seemed to last a lifetime, the footsteps continued down the hall. 

What was Lilith doing? The thought that she could be looking for Luz occurred to her and she shivered. 

Luz was shaken from her spiraling thoughts by the sound of another door opening down the hall. The worst-case scenarios her mind supplied (Lilith going into Luz’s room for some reason?) barely had time to take root before the door closed again and Luz heard the muffled sound of… running water. 

…Okay, so in retrospect, ‘looking for the bathroom’ had been a pretty obvious answer to the question of what Lilith had been doing. But in Luz’s defense, Lilith was evil! …Had been evil? She did end up enlisting Luz’s help to rescue Eda, but she was also the reason Eda had ended up imprisoned in the first place. The memory of her proud mentor, forced to crouch like a caged animal to fit in her prison, brought Luz’s resentment towards Lilith bubbling to the surface. Realizing she was gritting her teeth, Luz let out a sigh and unclenched her jaw. The beginnings of a plan were beginning to form, despite the voice of responsibility in the back of her mind supplying a long list of reasons it was a bad idea. 

Luz opened the door with the utmost caution, wincing at the creak. Hopefully the sound of running water—which was still going, Lilith must have been washing her face or something—had masked the noise. She slipped out into the hallway, not bothering to close the door behind her. 

The door to the bathroom was just a few feet down the hall, light spilling out from the crack beneath it. She had just made it to the door when the sound of the sink stopped, and Luz heard the squeak of the old towel rack Eda had fished out from one of her garbage runs. 

Was she really about to do this? Luz held the glyph paper in one hand, carefully positioned face up in her palm. There was a thrumming anxiety filling her with the urge to tap her feet or click a pen or _something._ Her whole body felt like a wire stretched taut, and the thought of coming face to face with Lilith didn’t make her feel any better. 

Eda still hadn’t come in, though. She could try and sneak out to look for her, or get answers herself, right from the source. 

_For Eda._

Despite her resolution, the twist of the doorknob still managed to startle Luz. The paper nearly slipped from her palm as she flinched, but she managed to hang onto it. 

The door swung open, and Luz brought her palms together, closing her eyes just before they made contact. 

The light was so bright she saw it flare through her eyelids, like the flashbulb from the school photos she always managed to blink for. She heard a strangled cry from in front of her as the light faded to its usual soft glow. 

Lilith was covering her eyes with one hand, attempting to draw a spell circle with the other—attempting because, like Eda’s attempts at magic that night, it simply fizzled into magical sparks that dissipated moments later. 

“Where’s Eda?” Luz demanded. Lilith, who had been rubbing her eyes, startled at the noise and squinted at her. 

“Wha—Luz?” She seemed to have missed Luz’s question entirely, which Luz maybe should have predicted given that she had just set off a magical firework in front of someone with newly gained light sensitivity. She felt a sliver of guilt before realizing how ridiculous it was and forcing it down. Lilith had done more than enough to warrant some temporary sunspots in her eyes. 

“I said, where’s Eda?” Luz’s badass demand was starting to sound a little more panicked kid to her ears, and she hated it. Hated how the sight of this stupid witch, who had damp strands of hair falling in front of her face and was currently squinting at her in confusion, still made her skin prickle with discomfort. 

“Eda?” Lilith said, blinking in confusion. “She’s—still outside, I would presume?” 

“You _presume?"_ Luz repeated, panic rising. _What had she done?_ “Why are you alone? What did you do to her?” Her chest felt tight, lungs not filling to capacity as her mind summoned images of Eda hurt or worse, unable to make it back to the house. 

“Wh—I didn’t do anything to her! We just talked,” Lilith protested. She sounded almost scandalized by the accusation. “I asked her if she wanted to go in, but she said she wanted a few minutes to clear her head.” Luz glared with open suspicion, but nonetheless felt the worst of the panic beginning to ebb away. Lilith didn’t seem to be capable of using magic right now, which severely limited how dangerous she could be, and Luz hadn’t taken that long recording her message to her mom… Still, she wasn’t about to just take Lilith at her word. 

“So if I go look out that window, she’ll still be out there?” Luz said. Maybe Lilith’s response would give something away. God, why hadn’t she thought to bring more glyphs? 

“Yes, but, hold on, Luz-” Luz, ignoring her, spun around and all but ran over to the window. She pressed her face up against the glass, scanning the darkness for—there. The mane of silvery hair glinting in the moonlight was unmistakable. Tension drained from her body so fast she felt lightheaded. Eda was fine, she was just sitting out there, looking at the stars. It was okay, she was— 

“Luz?” 

The voice from _way too close_ behind her made Luz flinch so badly she nearly bashed her head against the glass window. She whirled around, heart in her throat, to find Lilith standing not a foot away from her, and for the briefest of seconds she thought she saw a shimmer, blue walls closing in—but then it was gone. 

“What?” she snapped venomously, taking some small amount of pride in the half-step back Lilith took in response. Unfortunately, Lilith seemed to regain her composure quickly, straightening her posture and taking a deliberate breath. 

“I owe you an apology.” 

For a moment, Luz was simply stunned. Confusion overpowered her anger and discomfort, before a more reasonable explanation presented itself to her. 

“Did Eda put you up to this?” she asked flatly, and was even more alarmed when Lilith chuckled in response. 

“The opposite, actually. She told me to give you some space, but, well, you found me,” she said with a wry smile that quickly faded. “And... you are more than due for one.” 

Luz… did not want to deal with this. She wanted Eda to be back inside, for her to hug Luz and tuck her into her sleeping bag and for Lilith to be far, far away. Unfortunately for her, Lilith seemed to take her lack of a response as permission to continue. 

“I put you directly in harm’s way, and used you to get to Eda… but more than that, I drew you into a situation you never should have been involved with, and it resulted in the loss of your path home.” The genuine contrition in her voice filled Luz’s gut with a sour feeling as her words began to sink in.

“A situation I never should have been involved with?” Luz said slowly. Her confusion was cast aside, discomfort shoved down, as a simmering fury began to bubble beneath her skin. If Lilith meant what she thought she meant by that… 

“Well, yes,” Lilith said matter of factly. “The curse was a matter between me and Eda, I should have kept you out of it.” That prim, ever-so-proper tone combined with the assertion that Lilith should have brushed Luz aside, like she had no business there, snapped the final threads holding Luz’s anger in check. 

“God, what is your _problem?"_ Luz demanded. Lilith’s eyes grew wide in shock, and Luz took a step forward, glaring harshly at the older witch. “You always act like you have this… this claim on Eda, but you treat her like she’s just some mess you’re forced to clean up after. I’m so sick of hearing you talk like you’re the only person who could possibly care about her, when I’ve never even seen you act like it!” Luz spat accusingly. “You’ve insulted her and attacked her and almost gotten her killed, and now you’re telling me _I_ shouldn’t have been involved?” 

Lilith made some stuttering sound as if to interrupt, mouth hanging open, but Luz barreled past.

“ _I_ got _myself_ involved because I wanted to actually help Eda, unlike you. And if I hadn’t come back, you’d both be dead!” Just saying the word made Luz’s throat momentarily close up in grief, heart aching with the phantom pain of watching the platform carrying Eda to her execution slowly ascend. “Don’t you dare tell me I shouldn’t have been there. You might be Eda’s sister, but she’s my family, too. This was _my choice._ I will _never_ turn my back on the people I love.” The _unlike you_ went unspoken, but Luz was pretty sure Lilith got the message, judging by the resulting flinch. 

Luz could have sworn Lilith was going to argue—her brow furrowed and she had that defensive hunch to her shoulders—but then, bafflingly, she didn’t, instead closing her eyes and letting out a measured sigh. The anger building inside Luz skipped like a scratched record, thrown off by the sudden shift in mood.

“You’re right,” Lilith said evenly. “I apologize.” 

Luz bristled. This was _wrong._ Frustration still tugged at her chest with a physical ache, she was yearning for a fight, but Lilith was just… apologizing? 

“Save your apology for Eda,” Luz shot back. “She’s the one you’ve been hurting this whole time!” 

“I haven’t—I know I took things too far this time, but you don’t know what you’re saying. I never hurt her before now, I was just trying to get her to join the Emperor’s Coven so she could be cured.” Lilith was almost pleading, like it was the most important thing in the world for Luz to believe her. Luz simply stared at her in disbelief that soon gave way to rage. 

“If you think this is the first time you’ve truly hurt Eda, you’re even more of an idiot than I thought,” Luz ground out through gritted teeth. 

“How could you possibly know-“ Lilith was finally beginning to sound frustrated, some distant part of Luz observed with a grim satisfaction, while the rest of her focused on shaping her churning outrage into a coherent sentence.

“What did you think trying to force her to join the Emperor’s Coven was?” Luz hissed. “You never _asked,_ you never listened—it wasn’t about what Eda wanted at all, it was about you.” Lilith looked stricken, somehow paler than usual, but she _still_ wasn’t arguing back. Luz wanted to scream. Fine, then. If Lilith wanted to play at taking the high ground, Luz would just have to pull her down to her level. 

“Why would I trust you, when you still can’t admit what you’ve done?” Luz spat derisively. “The only reason I’m okay with you being here is that if you try anything, I’ll be there to stop you. I won’t let you hurt Eda ever again.” 

“Would you stop saying that!” 

_Finally._ Lilith’s shout brought Luz’s already racing heartbeat to a jackhammer pace, but something in her crowed in victory at having finally gotten under Lilith’s skin as she noticed the witch’s face flushing with anger. “Stop saying I’m going to—to hurt Eda!” She clenched her fists in frustration, turned as if to walk away, then back to face Luz, all in the span of a second, while Luz watched on in morbid fascination. “I just took half of an incurable curse for her! Why would you think I’d still want to hurt her?” 

Luz narrowed her eyes, glaring at Lilith. The hungry flames licking at the edges of her mind were growing in intensity, making Luz’s skin flush with heat despite the chill of the drafty hallway. Frustration that had been building and building in her since that terrible moment of helplessness when Luz had been held captive, used to lure Eda to her doom, had finally found an out, in the form of one incredibly stupid question. 

“Why would you hurt her?” Luz didn’t sound like herself, didn’t feel like herself, but her blood was boiling and the thought of trying to clamp down on her anger was so ridiculous it almost made her want to laugh, high and bitter. “Why wouldn’t you hurt her? That’s all you ever do! Every single time I’ve seen you, you’ve tried to ruin Eda’s life!” Lilith’s eyes grew wide with shock. 

“I wasn’t trying to ruin-” 

“Well you were! And you did!” Luz shouted. “She doesn’t have magic now and it’s all your fault, because you wanted to FIX HER! That was all you ever thought about, and now look what you’ve done.”

She glared at Lilith, but she just stood there, transfixed. That was fine, Luz wasn’t done.

“She _missed you,_ you know. She tried to pretend she didn’t, but every so often she would let something slip about her childhood, and the look on her face… even after you’d been hunting her for years, she just wanted her sister back. But you were too obsessed with _hiding your mistake_ to even do that much for her.” 

Lilith took a step back, nearly stumbling. Her face was pinched, like each word Luz spoke was a knife stabbing into her. Good. Luz hoped it hurt. 

“I thought I could help…” Lilith stuttered weakly. Seeing the powerful witch cowed, backing off, should have been gratifying to Luz, but her words were like gasoline poured on an already blazing fire. 

“Shut. UP!” Luz snarled. “I know what I saw! You weren’t trying to help, you were trying to win. I thought you just wanted to put Eda in her place, but now I get it.” The realization had been creeping up on her each time Lilith spoke, and now it loomed like a shadow over the horizon, the shape of it slick and oily in Luz’s mind. Disgust filled her stomach, and she’s never, ever hated anyone like this before. “You were trying to put her in her place and fix your mistake in one go, so no one ever had to find out.” Luz took a step forward, closing the gap between her and Lilith once more. “Don’t tell me you thought you were _helping_ when you ordered to have her branded! You would have stamped out everything that made Eda herself, just so you wouldn’t have to admit how _awful_ you are!” 

Even in the dim light of her orb, the look of shame on Lilith’s face was plain to see, but it wasn’t enough. Luz had thought letting her anger out would help her calm down, but the memory of that encounter with Lilith, the look of satisfaction on her face as she gave the order to the Emperor’s Guard, was just more fuel for the pyre. She couldn’t even look at the witch now, and turned away in disgust. Her insides felt twisted up and shriveled, and some distant part of her screamed that _this wasn’t helping,_ but the hurt continued to pour out of her. 

“You did something horrible to Eda, and instead of owning up to it, you _kept hurting her._ You tried to… to control, and contain, and fix her, when all she wanted was her family! Why couldn’t you just be there for her?” Luz’s vision blurred and she blinked away tears, too furious to even be embarrassed. The sheer unfairness of the situation made her want to scream, to break something, but there was nothing she could do. Eda could never get all those years with her sister back, could never get her magic back. Luz couldn’t help her at all, and the helplessness swirled together with the grief and rage. She was moving before she had even considered the action, closing the gap between her and Lilith and grabbing a fistful of her stupid coven leader robe, pulling her down to stare defiantly into her wide eyes. 

“Eda is the smartest, kindest, most loyal witch in the Boiling Isles, and you…” The thought churning in her head felt dangerous, the words like broken glass in her throat, but she spat them out anyway. “She deserves a better sister than you.” Luz let go of the robe and took a step back, glaring defiantly at Lilith, daring her to say anything. 

Lilith didn’t move. For a moment, the words simply hung in the air between them. Luz’s heart pounded so hard she could hear the thump in her ears, the buzz of anger still present battling against the weight of what she just said. There was a part of her that wanted to take it back, and a part that wanted to keep twisting the knife until Lilith felt just as miserable and helpless as she did. 

Then Lilith spoke, and Luz realized she might already be there. 

“I _know."_

Two words. It should’ve sounded like another excuse, but the raw loathing in her voice doused Luz’s fury in an instant as she realized it was aimed at Lilith herself. Her voice cracked as she spoke, desperation leaking out and spilling onto the floor like blood gushing from an open wound. And then, in the middle of the dim, dusty hallway of the Owl House, Lilith Clawthorne started to cry. 

It was neither loud nor dramatic, and that somehow made it all the worse to witness. Lilith simply crumpled into herself, first leaning back against the wall for support, before sliding down to the floor, knees drawn up to her chest. Her face was a blotchy red, eyes screwed shut, but the glint of tears collecting in her lashes was unmistakable, even as she attempted to turn away from Luz’s sight. Lilith’s shoulders trembled and leapt with nearly-silent sobs, and she wrapped her arms tight around herself, squeezing so hard Luz could see her knuckles turning white. The quiet was punctuated only by sniffling and the occasional pathetic whine, barely audible, and despite herself, despite the disgust that had overwhelmed her just seconds ago, Luz’s heart clenched in sympathy as she took in the achingly familiar sight of one attempting to cry silently. 

She felt brittle, like the burnt out shell of a building after a great fire. The searing grip of anger digging its fingers into her heart had disappeared, leaving only scar tissue behind, and without that righteous fury giving her a course, Luz was lost. Adrift. What had she even been hoping to accomplish here? She didn’t feel satisfied, or victorious. In fact, as the seconds trickled by and Lilith curled further into herself, seemingly blind to her surroundings, all Luz felt was the distinct squirming feeling of guilt pooling in her gut. 

She leaned back against the same wall Lilith currently had her back to and, with a long sigh, slid down to a sitting position next to Lilith, who flinched slightly but otherwise made no move to acknowledge her presence. Luz chewed on the silence for a few seconds longer, wondering if she was really going to do this. 

“I shouldn’t have said that.” 

That got a reaction out of Lilith—she looked up at Luz sharply, and _wow,_ was she a mess. Red eyes, blotchy cheeks, and hair mussed up and springing free from its usual subdued style, but worst of all was her voice. 

“Why not?” Lilith croaked. She sounded like she’d been swallowing sandpaper, and Luz had to suppress a sympathetic wince. “It’s true. All of it. I’ve been awful to her. She really does deserve a better sister than me.” 

“Eda does deserve better than how you’ve treated her, yeah,” Luz began, treading carefully and hoping against hope she wouldn’t make things worse. Lilith’s flinch and the shameful drop of her gaze wasn’t encouraging, but she pressed on. “But I wasn’t thinking about what she wanted, either, when I said that. She doesn’t want a better sister. Not a different one, at least. She wants you.” A tiny piece of the tension Luz was carrying dissolved, and she let out a small sigh. “And I won’t get in the way of that.” 

Lilith lifted her head to stare at Luz, disbelief written all over her face. Luz shot her a flat look. 

“This is _not_ me forgiving you,” she said. Luz didn’t think she would be ready to do that for a while, if ever. “But if you’re gonna be staying here, I can at least give you a chance. For Eda.” She pushed herself to her feet, dusted off her pajama pants, then held a hand out to Lilith, who stared at it blankly. 

“Well?” Luz said impatiently. Lilith took her hand. She was lighter than Luz would have expected from a human woman—another quirk of witch biology—but it was still a bit of effort to pull her to her feet. Luz dropped her hand as soon as they were both standing, and regarded Lilith. 

“Thank you, Luz,” Lilith said roughly. “For giving me a chance. I won’t waste it.” 

“Thank me by being a good sister to Eda again. I know you knew how to do it, once. Eda seems to think so at least. She… she deserves to be happy.” 

Luz was pretty sure Lilith was tearing up again, but there was a watery smile on her face nonetheless. 

“She does,” Lilith said softly, despite the waver in her voice. “I think having you in her life has done more for her in that regard than I have in a long, long time. She truly loves you.” 

Luz felt her face heat up and looked away instinctively. It wasn’t like it was a _surprise,_ Eda had said it right before Luz had gone upstairs, but hearing it from someone else, someone who was, if not close, then in some way important to Eda, still made little starbursts of warmth fizzle and pop in her chest. She wanted to say she felt the same way—that being here was the happiest she had been in forever, that living with Eda was a dream come true. That finding an adult—a guardian, teacher, parent, who didn’t just accept the way she was, but _understood_ because she was the _same_ —made her feel seen in a way she hadn’t known was possible. She wanted to say that when she thought of home she thought of the Owl House, that when a teacher in Hexside would instruct them to get something signed by a parent, she would think of her mama _and_ Eda, and a thousand other little things that all stumbled over one another and rolled together and what came out instead was, 

“I love her, too.”

Luz supposed that did the trick pretty well, too. For a few seconds, the two simply stood there, and Luz allowed herself to marvel at the novelty of sharing a comfortable silence with Lilith Clawthorne of all people. 

Then Lilith sniffled, and a split-second later, Luz witnessed the transformation Lilith underwent the second she realized she had been crying in front of another person. Her whole posture stiffened and she straightened up like she was standing at attention for a nerve-wracking roll call. She then gave a painfully forced cough, one hand coming up to cover her mouth. 

“Well. I’m going to take my leave now, and…” Lilith visibly grappled for an excuse end the conversation, and despite herself, Luz had to suppress a smile at her palpable awkwardness. “Use the bathroom.” She nodded vaguely down the hall. 

“I’ll go wait for Eda in her room,” Luz replied, then paused. Should she say goodnight? She did say she’d give Lilith a chance, but… “I’ll see you in the morning,” she settled on. Lilith nodded, and that was that. 

As she walked down the hall in the direction of Eda’s bedroom, the exhaustion from the night’s events washed over Luz twofold. As if her daring prison break and magical duel hadn’t been enough, she really had to throw in a verbal showdown with Eda’s previously estranged sister, too, huh? Luz could hardly tell where the physical aches from being tossed around by Belos ended and where the emotional drain began. 

The door groaned as she opened it, and Luz gave a playful ‘oh, hush’ to the offending hinge. She walked in, closed the door behind her, turned around, and nearly shrieked as she was met with the sight of one golden eye glinting at her from the darkness. 

“Eda?” Luz hissed, heart pounding. 

“Luz!” Just hearing Eda’s voice again was a weight lifted off her shoulders, but she still felt like her head was spinning. 

“But you—outside?” Wow, if she hadn’t already been planning to go to bed, then that was certainly a sign that it was high time to do so. Fortunately, Eda was by now well-versed in the linguistic mystery known as ‘sleepy Luz talk.’ Luz carefully walked over to the nest, hoping Eda hadn’t left anything to trip over in her path. 

“I let myself in a few minutes ago,” Eda said casually. “It sounded like you and Lily were having a chat, so I slipped in here to give you two some privacy.” 

Oh, god. Luz felt her face heating up. Eda had been inside? 

“Did you hear…” _Me blowing up at your sister? Lilith crying?_ Luz wasn’t sure what the more mortifying option was. 

“Nope!” Eda said, popping the p dramatically. “Didn’t hear a thing. Wasn’t paying attention, to be honest.” 

Luz couldn’t help but snort at the obvious lie, but she would take the excuse. It was such an Eda thing to do, she was briefly overcome with a dizzyingly sweet burst of appreciation. Her mama would have called it a white lie and tutted disapprovingly, but Luz knew it was just Eda’s way of being kind. One of them, anyways. 

Managing to reach the nest without tripping over any broken human relics or errant potion flasks, Luz ran her hands absently over the edge of it, feeling the rough edges of the sticks and branches it was composed of. Now that her eyes had been given a moment to adjust to the darkness, she could see a vaguely Eda shaped blur around the glowing golden eye. 

“Sorry about the dark. Woulda turned on a light, but.” A movement in the inky blackness that Luz interpreted as a shrug. “Lights are all magical, like everything else in this house.” Though Eda's voice was light, there was an underlying tension to it that Luz didn’t miss, and her heart ached to hear it. 

“Tomorrow I’ll teach you how to do your own light glyph,” she promised. 

“Sounds good. So, you decided you’re sleeping in the nest tonight?” Eda lifted up her pillow and, despite the near total darkness, Luz was certain she was smirking at her. 

“Yep! Um, if that’s okay?” 

“‘Course it is, kiddo. This thing was built big enough for—well, not that that matters anymore. Point is, there’s more than enough room for you. Get on up here.” 

Luz grabbed onto the proffered hand and allowed Eda to help hoist her up over the edge of the nest. Just being near Eda again was doing wonders to soothe Luz’s tension after her run-in with Lilith. Her presence was like a warm, cozy blanket wrapped around Luz’s shoulders—in addition to the actual pile of blankets and pillows Eda had thrown into the nest. Then, as she stepped down into the bowl of the nest, Luz’s foot landed on a scrap of fabric and slipped out from under her. Her arms cartwheeled in a futile attempt to regain balance, but just as her stomach was filled with that horrible swooping feeling of free-fall, she was tugged sharply to the side. Instead of landing on hard wooden floorboards, her fall was cushioned by one rather bony witch, who let out an undignified “Oof.” For a moment, Luz just lay there, dazed. Eda’s hip was digging into her side, but she was here, and safe, and warm, and Luz’s heart was so full she thought it might burst. She was home. 

“You alright, hon?” Eda murmured, soft as anything. Luz answered by way of hug, circling her arms around Eda as best she could with her back to the nest and leaning her head against the witch’s chest. Eda wrapped an arm around her shoulder and gave her a squeeze, like she wanted Luz somehow closer, and despite that being literally impossible at the moment, Luz was pretty sure she understood. 

“You’re safe,” she said simply. Her eyes were growing heavier by the second, and the darkness of Eda’s bedroom seemed to wrap around her like a cocoon, shrinking the world down to just the two of them.

“Thanks to you,” came the response. Luz hummed something that might have been an agreement and allowed herself to close her eyes, listening to the gentle rise and fall of Eda’s chest.

“Not gonna use your sleeping bag?” Eda asked softly. The question reached Luz through a sleepy haze, and she grappled briefly for a coherent response before humming out something that might have been a no. 

“Got you,” she mumbled in elaboration. Eda was plenty warm, and she really didn’t want to move… She felt as much as heard Eda’s resulting chuckle, and relaxed further into her sleepy bliss when Eda began to run her fingers through Luz’s hair. 

“Sure do, kiddo. I’m not goin’ anywhere.” 

There was just one single thread tethering Luz to consciousness, the faintest sense of urgency that cut through the layers of warm contentment lulling her to sleep. Not worry, just the distant suspicion that she was forgetting something. 

It was… something she had to tell Eda? That felt right, but what? It was too hard to think past the warmth spreading suffusing every cell of her body. She felt so safe, surely whatever it was could wait until… _oh._

That was it. 

With the last of her energy, Luz clung to consciousness just long enough to share her revelation. Four words, spoken from the heart and mumbled into Eda’s side as she slipped into a deep, restful sleep.

“I love you, mom…” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> every time, i tell myself "the next chapter won't be so long." and every time i am lying. 
> 
> THANKS FOR READING YALL.... i feel like a broken record saying this but whew this chapter was tough to write. tensions were somehow even higher than in the last one, and I really wanted to get the right mix of anger, grief, and fear for Eda's safety that's motivating Luz here. i know she's acting very differently than would be considered "normal" in the show, but... she's going through a lot right now and isn't ready to process it all. those complex emotions end up finding an easy target in Lilith, and, well. this happens. 
> 
> if you liked it, or if i made you cry, let me know with a comment? they really make my day. also, should there be another chapter?? i've gone back and forth on this so many times. currently marking it as complete but that's not set in stone... 
> 
> p.s. of COURSE Eda said it back. Luz was just asleep so she didn't hear it.


End file.
